My Choose Your Own Apocalypse Blogfest entry
So what have I done to ensure my survival to fast coming apocalypse?
I uprooted myself from my homeland to move to the most geologically stable continent on the Planet. I have, therefore put myself out of harms reach of earthquakes. I reside in the lightly populated area of North Queensland in Australia, a full two hours drive from the largest city in the area, Cairns.
I have put myself behind the great barrier reef and live 900m above sea level (about 3000ft), 60 km inland, limitng the impact of both flood and tsunami.
I live in a tropical area thereby bypassing the need for heating my home, and keeping myself out of harms way for any sudden beginning to a new ice age.
Also, by living in the southern hemisphere, the trade winds will keep the bulk of the nuclear radiation away from my house, should the northern hemisphere self destruct in a series of nuclear fireballs.
By moving to an underpopulated area of the globe, I also don't expect the Aliens to bother targeting this area, they'll be after the military and nuclear powers. Australia doesn't rank.
Geographically, I have done well.
However, the Apocalypse won't be any of those. The way my luck runs I'll be attacked by an army of starving man eating zombies.
If that's the case, and I'm facing down such a horde, I suspect, to quote one of the post WWIII films to come out of the eighties, the survivors will envy the dead. In order to ensure that I do not suffer long from such unfortunate envy, I have kept myself nice and fat, to be an attractive feast for such an army.
I also hope to meet a vampire first, so that instead, I'll be commanding the horde instead of being eaten by it. To that end, I'm using my blog to advertise for such a meeting.
If you are a vampire and are in need of a reasonably smart, problem solving lackey, be sure to contact me through this blog, so that a meeting can be arranged at your earliest convenience.
The truth is, this end of days will be probably be marked by the birth of the antichrist, or peraps its creation- either through genetic maipulation, natural evolution or even the construction of the first true computer AI. Which means we still have time to do something about it.